


til death yeets us apart

by xllx (exasperatedmoron)



Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: Best Friends, Crack, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Getting Together, Humor, M/M, Moving In Together, Poor Chloe, They Have Kids, but there's still scenes in the afterlife, chloe is lucas' best friend, no hurt, no pain, no sad yeets, this is 100 percent crack, uhh technically they die here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-19
Updated: 2019-12-19
Packaged: 2021-02-18 13:20:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21861490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exasperatedmoron/pseuds/xllx
Summary: lucas thinks he's cursedchloé is getting so damn tired of his bullshit
Relationships: Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant
Comments: 2
Kudos: 47





	til death yeets us apart

**Author's Note:**

> this is me doing what everyone told me not to do.
> 
> enjoy

**[ high school ]**

“Fucking hell, Chloé. Everywhere I go, it’s almost like Eliott is lurking there SOMEWHERE. I can never get away from him!”

Chloé gave Lucas a blank look as he bangs his head against his locker, having bumped into Eliott coming out of class and spilling the taller boy’s coffee all over the two of them.

“You guys are in the same school. The same year. Almost the same classes. You need to stop complaining about this every damn time or I will cut out your eyes so you’ll never see him again.”

“Noo don’t do that, he’s so sexy…”

Lucas jumps as Chloé slams her locker shut with his face right next to it and walks away, leaving her best friend deaf.

**[ university ]**

“C H L O É !”

“No.”

Chloé started walking faster but Lucas managed to catch up with her, following her into her Political Science classroom. “You’re going to start talking about Eliott and I do not have the coffee to deal with this shit right now.”

“I swear, Chlo! I can never get away from him! He’s everywhere!!”

“Aren’t you guys dating now? LIke,,, for the last 2 years? I would be concerned if you guys  _ didn’t _ spend every moment you have with each other.”

“No no no, it’s more than that. The curse is getting worse!”

Chloé slammed her forehead against her table and brought her bag up to cover her head, hoping it will block out his voice. “Oh, fantastic. You’re calling it a curse.”

“It is! We said ‘goodbye’ three times today. FIrst, we got off the bus and he went left to meet Idriss and I went right to find you. One minute later I bump into him at the water fountain. Then, I left the water fountain to go get my schedule from the office and while waiting for it, Idriss and Eliott walked in because Idriss needed something! After I left, I was going up the staircase to come and find you, and when I reached your floor, Eliott and Idriss stepped out of the elevator.”

“Maybe it’s Idriss. Maybe he’s your true soulmate.”

“It’s a curse!”

“You’re a curse.”

**[ moving in together ]**

Chloé huffs as she places the last box down in Elu’s new kitchen. Her entire body was aching and she was beginning to think of some ways to rip Lucas a new one for breaking his ankle, allowing him to sit comfy on the couch while her and Eliott do the heavy lifting.

Or maybe she’ll kill the both of them. That way Eliott will stop making out with Lucas while she’s in the next room, helping them unpack.

“Lallemant! Get your flat ass here and tell me where you want these placed!”

Lucas hobbles over to the kitchen, face contorted in a way she’s grown to recognize (and hate). “Maybe Eliott and I shouldn’t move in together.”

“After all I’ve done? Couldn’t you have said that 5 hours ago?! What even brought this up?”

“The curse.”

Chloé’s face dropped and radiated ‘you’re on my shit list’ vibes. “What now.”

“I went to the bathroom, and he gets out of it. I wanted to rest on the bed, and he’s under the covers. I wanted to get some air on the balcony, and he’s there putting down the plants. I’m surprised he isn’t here, to be honest.”

“You _live_ in the _same place_ as him.”

“Yeah, but all of that happened within 5 minutes. He’s everywhere. It’s almost like we’re magnets constantly being pulled together. Maybe living with him would make the curse worse.”

Silently, Chloé went over to the stove to turn the gas on and then to the kitchen table to rummage through her purse for something.

“Uh,,, Chloé? What are you doing?”

Chloé grins as she pulls out a lighter and walks back to the stove.

“Burning this place down to fix your problem.”

“CHLOÉ!”

**[ wedding day ]**

“Lucas? Lucas! Where are you? Seriously I-”

Chloé stops in her tracks and backtracks a step to look down a dark hall. She could see a short figure trying to cower behind a plant.

“Ohh for goodness sakes- What is going on now!?” She storms down the hall and yanks him up, making sure he didn’t mess up his tux and hair that she worked so hard on.

“The curse… it’s back.”

“IT’S BEEN 8 YEARS. SHUT UP ABOUT THE STUPID CURSE!”

“It’s real, Chlo! I went to piss and-”

“He came in the bathroom a second later?”

“Then, I went out to greet the guests and-”

“He was right outside the door?”

“Then when I turned around to walk back in-”

“He.. Okay, unless you’re going to tell me he teleported right in front of you, I can’t see where this is going.”

“He turned to walk back in using the door beside mine and as i was walking back to the dressing room, the door opened and he walked right into me!”

Chloé sighed and straightens his tie before shoving him back into the corner.

“You believe me now?”

“No. But I’m leaving you here because I'm tired of this shit.”

**[ babysitting ]**

“I don’t understand why you’re making me babysit the twins even though you and Eliott will be right here?” Chloe complains as she balances baby Mika on one arm and baby Chloé on another.

“Ah, that’s because Eliott will be in his office and I’ll be in the bedroom.”

“... Oh, no. Don’t you dare tell me it’s-”

“The curse!”

Chloé swore she would have punched him, if it weren’t for the two babies in her arms. It’s been 12 fucking years, and quite frankly, she’s getting too old for this shit.

Not too old in terms of her age. Just, old enough to want to move to London and never interact with the Lallemant-Demaury family ever again.

“He works at home. You guys share a house- a room! It’s not a curse, it’s called living together.”

“It’s not just at home! We run into each other at the cafe down the street, the hospital where Imane and Sofiane work and we’ve even run into each other at the same train station in the next city! It’s gotten to the point where it happens almost everyday. So we’re trying to see if not seeing each other for 24 hours will break the curse.”

“And you need me to babysit… why?”

“Because Eliott is staying in his office. I'm staying here and the kids will be allowed to go anywhere. So if there’s anything the four of us need…”

Chloe rolled her eyes and cocked her head. “So, I’m the babysitter and the help?”

“No! Not like that-”

“What if Eliott needs to use the bathroom?”

“He has a bottle.”

“Mhm. And if he needs to do some other business?”

“..... Ah, shit.”

“Exactly.”

**[ ??? ]**

Chloé sat up and rubbed her eyes. She felt as if she had woken up from a 10 year nap and someone was shining a flashlight into her eyes.

“Lucas?” She squinted and her eyes started to adjust to the brightness, which seems to be coming from all angles. Lucas was standing near her, looking around in awe.

“Lucas? What’s going on?”

“I.. I think we’re dead?”

“DEAD?!” She sat up and examined the area around her. She couldn’t find the words to explain how bright but empty it was… But considering the unnatural glow coming from the air and the ground… Yup. Definitely some form of the afterlife. “You… I can’t believe this. Your curse really was a curse.”

“You believe it now!”

“Yeah. It was a curse on me to make me suffer and eventually lead to my death.”

“Wh-Wait a minute. How did it lead to your death?”

“If memory serves me right, we died in a motor accident because you wanted to get lunch at the deli 7 blocks away so that you won’t bump into Eliott, right?”

“... fuck.”

“Yeah. Then you saw him in across the street and immediately made a U-turn to go to a different deli, but was too stupid to check around and nearly hit another car.”

“Oh, shit. I didn’t hit them, right?”

“No, you just swerved hit a pole and we yeeted off the bike and off the bridge.”

Lucas groaned and fell forward, face first. “It’s the stupid curse, I swear.”

Chloe sat crossed legged beside him and started petting his head. “Well, between the curse, and me. One was bound to kill you eventually. At least it was the curse.”

“At least Eliott is still okay.”

Right as he said that, they heard a groan coming from behind them.

“Oh… You’ve got to be kidding me- How did you end up here?!” Chloé nearly screamed the last bit as Lucas scrambled to his feet to tackle Eliott.

“Ch- Lucas!” Eliott caught Lucas in his arms and lifted him up, hugging him so tight that prompted Chloé to remember that he had probably seen their deaths.

Oops.

“Oh, I saw you guys get thrown over the bridge. You guys were unconscious, or dead,,, as soon as you hit the water. But I didn’t want to risk it, so I jumped in after you.”

“You WHAT?!”

“It wasn’t that high!! Really, I didn’t get hurt at all when I hit the water.”

“Then how did you die?”

“I forgot that I didn’t know how to swim.”

“... You know what. You two deserve this.”

“Okay, fair. But you’re here too.”

“Yeah, I deserve this because I wasn’t smart enough to follow Manon and move to London when I had the chance.”

“Well, at least the three of us still have each other for all eternity!”

Well. Fuck.

Chloé started crying.

**Author's Note:**

> not my best work. more of a random plot idea that came into my head.
> 
> thankiew again to my awesome agayzing beta, ro


End file.
